So I just got off the phone with my mommy. She told me how she had attended a memorial service this morning for a college senior who recently committed suicide. I felt heartbroken hearing the news, despite the fact that I hadn’t know her, but just the fact that a person felt so alone in this world to the point where she would take her own life really pierced my heart. My mommy went on to explain how she had come to know the college girl’s mother: they had met at church, her mom was an active member at the church’s “Celebrate Recovery” group and had recently overcome six years of depression. Unfortunately, this girl was also trapped in a slump of depression. She had a younger sister that attends UCLA, and was the type of girl who called and talked to her mother everyday while attending school at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. She often talked about how alone she felt at school, especially with the recent elections swirling about. She held conservative views, but felt so isolated and ostracized by the more liberal people on campus that she felt like she had no outlet to express her own beliefs–so she kept to herself. More recently, she had voted yes on Prop 8 (an unpopular vote in most CA colleges), but was really taken aback by the level of hatred and anger shown by her liberal friends and fellow students. At one point, her mother had even told her that it would be okay if she wanted to drop out of school and go home. But it simply came down to the fact that there was no one there for her, her friends had seemingly turned their backs. All she had was her mom. But I guess that wasn’t enough. So she committed suicide on Monday, and today was her memorial service, and tomorrow yet another new day.
I don’t talk to my mommy as much as I used to, but I felt it was particularly touching that she would call me to talk about this particular incident. My mommy didn’t simply call to inform me about the reality of suicide, but she reminded me to be aware of the people around me. Furthermore, she told me to be aware of how my actions may be impacting the people around me. As with this girl, her “friends” played a big role in demoralizing her, which indirectly let to her death. My mommy told me that in the midst of such a hate-driven world, it’s hard for people to feel loved. Citing my responsibilities towards residents at school and in the residence halls, she wanted to remind me to love people, especially the ones who seemingly blend into the background of a busy campus.
Aside from the hostilities of the post-election protests going on, there are people out there who are looking for someone to care about them, someone to go to in times of need, someone to love them in this time of nationwide distress. I feel incredibly selfish that I have spent my time pursuing my goals and my happiness with total disregard for those around me. By doing this, I feel it makes me no better than those “friends” who turned their backs on this girl based on her single vote among other things. This is a reminder to Love. In all things, Love. I pray that we will all be able to take this message and apply it to our lives because for many it’s merely a matter of security, but for some, it’s a matter of life and death.